Friday, 14 June 2013

The 5 Worst Hair Metal Songs

I had so much fun writing The Hair Metal Hierarchy last week that I decided I wanted to write some kind of a follow-up to it. A lot of people found my article by typing "worst hair metal bands" into Google, so, I was inspired to create this little list.
5.Once Bitten Twice Shy by Great White
Don't get me wrong, I love this band. But it was a rather lousy cover of what already wasn't a very good song (original was by Ian Hunter, a favorite musician of mine) and I especially don't like that it became their most well-known song, when they had many others which were far superior, like House of Broken Love, Save Your Love, or Rock Me.
4. When the Children Cry by White Lion
White Lion had the perfect foundation for a great hair metal band: a gorgeous singer and a very.talented guitarist. However, the songwriting wasn't always up to speed, and they tended to be on the wimpy side. This song, for example, is way on the wimpy side. I mean honestly, When the Children Cry?
3. We Only Come Out At Night by Lizzy Borden
I still feel sorry for these guys. I know they tried hard, but they simply weren't very good. Their songs were like Iron Maiden meets Los Angeles, and it just didn't quite work. Sorry.
2.Dreams by Van Hagar
Look, I really could have put any Van Hagar garbage in here, to the exception maybe of Love Comes Walking In, which isn't so bad. In the post David Lee Roth era, with Sammy Hagar singing, Sammy began to dominate the band, and even began playing guitar sometimes. Considering that Eddie Van Halen is one of the greatest guitarists who ever lived, this was completely unnecessary, and Van Halen fans like myself were pained to see Eddie playing keyboards more and more often. Dreams is probably the cheesiest and most irritating of the lot.
1.More Than Words by Extreme
Look, sorry to rip on Extreme again, they also made the bottom of my last hair metal countdown, but then again, I'm not so sorry, because Nuno Bettencourt was an asshole, Gary Cherone made Van Halen reach new lows, and their music sucks. More Than Words, albeit immense popularity, is boring, predictable, and forgettable.

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